Love Hurts, but so does Pittsburgh’s Dirty Dozen

Think-a to za future: itza Saturday dopo Thanksgiving eeeeen Pittsburgh…Love Hurts, but does it-a hurta worse-a than za Dirty Dozen, Pittsburgh’s hardest percorso in bicicletta? Non lo so and itza better that-a youa … deeeecide! Ciao ciao!

Vs.

I-a personally think-a they’ll both a-leave you tired-out in-a zee end…

Love Hurts

Love hurts, love scars, love wounds
And mars, any heart
Not tough or strong enough
To take a lot of pain, take a lot of pain
Love is like a cloud
Holds a lot of rain
Love hurts… ooh,ooh love hurts

You are young, I know, but even so
I know a thing or two
I’ve learned from you
I really learned a lot, I really learned a lot
Love is like a flame
It burns you when it’s hot
Love hurts… ooh,ooh love hurts

Some fools think of happiness
Blissfulness, togetherness
Some fools fool themselves I guess
They’re not foolin’ me

I know it isn’t true, I know it isn’t true
Love is just a lie
Made to make you blue
Love hurts… ooh,ooh love hurts
Ooh,ooh love hurts

I know it isn’t true, I know it isn’t true
Love is just a lie
Made to make you blue
Love hurts… ooh,ooh love hurts
Ooh,ooh love hurts…

Apologies to Stephanie

Steph: sorry, I was just about to pick out your poem when a USADA doping control officer showed up at my front door with regards from Anne Gripper and the UCI (and when Anne says “pee” one must pee). A madcap adventure ensued whereby I tried to drink enough to be able to produce a urine sample to prove that I’m no longer taking EPO.

I’m supposed to be in Florida right now – or better said – I had the opportunity to be in Florida right now, but things got f’ed-up, as they often can when it comes to matters of the heart. So – as you could surmise based on the fact that I’m writing a blog entry from Pittsburgh after having been subjected to an OOC doping control on Thanksgiving Eve – I’m not in Florida, which sucks, but at the same time is a by-product of everything I’ve ever done up until now.

I’ll come up with a gratitude list later tonight, after I polish off that bottle of Chianti, but in the meantime, let me leave you with that poem:

“Melancholy”

When you said you were coming it was but empty words;
Now that you have gone you have left no trace.
The moon shines aslant the roofs at the fifth watch;
I dream that you have gone away for good;
I cry out, but it is impossible to call you back.
I try to write you, but such is my haste that the ink is not properly mixed.
On the top part of the cage the light of the wax lanterns reflects the gold king-fisher feathers.
The musk perfume floats faintly through the embroidered hibiscus curtains.
Liu was sorry that Paradise was so far away,
But I am still more troubled, for I am much further away than he.
The east wind comes in gusts, bringing soft drops of rain;
Beyond the hibiscus pond there is faint thunder.
The gold toad bites on the lock and the incense comes through;
The jade tiger pulls at the rope and water is drawn up from the well.
The lady Chia spied through the screen on the charms of the young secretary Han;
The lady Mi left a pillow for the prince of Wei,
But the human heart in spring cannot hope to vie with the flowers,
For every surge of heart there is a pinch of ashes.

-Li Shang-Yin (T’ang Dynasty)

To write or not to write (a book) + How an Anti-Doping Control was Defeated

Several times it’s been suggested to me by everyone from friends to members of the mainstream media (and friends in the mainstream media) that I should write a book about my “life story.” The saga of Yuliet’s escape from Cuba and flight across Europe before being kidnapped and forcibly repatriated is terrible – but compelling – and my insights into the dark world of doping in sport (ie., what really goes on and how it happens) are two segments of what could be an engaging (if short) read. Think an American version of “Breaking the Chain”, except not just about doping (and with a better cover)!

Love, betrayal, international intrigue, Apache gunships, juvenille humor (for that I’d consult Burt Hoovis), crime, punishment, redemption, confusing sentence structures, gratuitous use of foreign words…it would be a classic in our time!

Until then, I thought I’d provide you all with an anecdote about one way in which I saw an anti-doping control defeated…BUT – I’ll have to get back to this later as I have a meeting in Robinson in 45min.

"The Leaf on the Water"

The wind tears a leaf from the willow tree;
it falls lightly upon the water,
and the waves carry it away.

Time has gradually effaced a memory from my heart,
and I watch the willow leaf drifting away on the waves;
since I have forgotten her
whom I loved,
I dream the day through in sadness,
lying at the water’s edge.

But the willow leaf floated back
under the tree,
and it seemed to me
that the memory could never be effaced
from my heart.

-Ouan-Tsi

"Love"

Lingering, lingering,
Pulsating, pulsating
Two hearts beat in one.
Fine as gossamer,
Vast as the waves,
Inconstant as the moon,
Frail as a flower,
This strange thing we call love,
What a prolific source of sorrows it is!

-Wu Yung
T’ang Dynasty